Friday, May 31, 2019

Workplace Relationships: Key to Job Satisfaction

Workplace Relationships

Finding the perfect position is only the beginning of job satisfaction. Have you ever heard someone say, “I’d like my job if it weren’t for the people I work with”? One of the greatest challenges in the workplace is getting along with other people. It hardly matters if someone is the best and brightest at what he does if he creates dissension in the office.

Regardless of whether someone is hired to lead or be part of the team, it is the ability to establish functional and healthy workplace relationships that can make or break their success and job satisfaction.

Wednesday, March 9, 2016

Do You Struggle with Difficult People?

Difficult people are everywhere. You can find them at work, in your neighborhood, at the local store, in government offices, in customer services and even in your own home. Now, to be honest, we can all be difficult at times, but today I’m talking about what I refer to as chronically difficult people – the people whose behavior is often obnoxious, rude, aggressive and just plain frustrating. In other words, their behavior is predictable… predictably difficult!

Difficult People

Difficult people come in a variety of styles with behavior patterns that fit some classic categories. The Tanks bully their way through every situation, steamrolling anyone who stands in their way without considering how others feel. The Exploders use “shock and awe” to get their way by blowing up so others learn to tiptoe around them or give in to prevent an angry outburst. The Know-it-All has to answer every comment and conversation with information designed to make themselves look better. The Super-Agreeable Charmers are those people who are the first to volunteer and make commitments, and then often don’t deliver (because nobody could keep as many promises as they make) which leaves everyone else stuck with more responsibility or unmet expectations. The Clams use silence as a powerful weapon to control people who are trying to gain consensus or move forward with ideas. The Indecisives can stymie negotiations and progress with their wavering and worry. The Wet Blankets can suck the fun out of anything with their negative attitudes and complaining. The Snipers wield a double-edged sword of appearing to agree and support, while secretly sabotaging and demeaning.

Thursday, January 7, 2016

The Platinum Rule

We have all heard the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. In other words, think about how you would like to be treated and extend that same treatment to others. No one can argue with the effectiveness of that rule, but I’d like to encourage you to become familiar with and apply what is referred to as the Platinum Rule.

The Platinum RuleHere’s the Platinum Rule: Do unto others as you know they would have you do unto them. The difference between the two rules is subtle, but it could help you build stronger relationships because it customizes the way we treat others to their preferences, not ours.

Let’s look at an example. If you want others to treat you with respect, then it is only right and appropriate for you to be respectful to others. But what does that look like? To you, respect might be giving someone time and space after a heated argument to cool off and be left alone to process their thoughts and emotions before trying again to resolve the issue. Since you value that, the Golden Rule leads you to extend that same courtesy to others. You try to hold off on discussing the emotionally charged topic thinking you are being respectful. But what if your spouse has a very different temperament from yours? What if s/he feels most respected when you are willing to engage the issue head on and talk things out until the conflict is resolved? The Platinum Rule would then suggest you do your best to not postpone addressing an emotionally charged topic, but rather stay appropriately engaged until the issue is resolved or until there is mutual agreement that a “time out” is needed. In other words, to apply the Platinum Rules means

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Ask the Right Questions, Receive Better Answers – Part II

Men Asking Questions

Last week we started talking about how asking good questions in the right way could improve communication and cooperation with your staff and coworkers.  The first three recommendations were to listen carefully, control your emotions, and start with something positive.  Today we will discuss a few more strategies.

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

5 Tips for Dealing with a Bull Terrier Boss

Most people have at some point in their lives had to deal with someone who refuses to lose. No matter how unreasonable their position and how obviously wrong they may be, they clamp down their jaw as instinctively as a bull terrier in a dogfight – and it seems nothing short of death will loosen it.

Bull Terrier Boss

It’s often not that complicated to deal with this sort of person at a dinner party, where the simplest strategy may be to avoid them or to feign agreement for a couple of hours until you can escape after dessert. But in the workplace this is seldom possible, and if the bulldog is your superior, you can come away from discussions frustrated, angry and hurt.

Thursday, June 12, 2014

What Makes a Great Dad?

In my blog earlier this week I discussed the importance of the father’s role in the lives of his children, but what does that mean to you in practical terms? Really, the question is, “What does it take to be a great dad?” Based on my work with hundreds of couples and families, I have found that great dads consistently practice five key principles.

Little Girl Helping Father with His Tie

Raising children is a little bit like building a home. I’m not an expert in construction, but I know that if you want to build a quality home, you need to pay close attention to the details – just as a father seeking to raise “quality” kids will find it helpful to keep these five key principles in mind.