Thursday, November 8, 2018

The Costly Effects of Low Self-Confidence

low self-confidenceEveryone struggles with a lack of confidence at times. It is estimated that 85% of the world’s population experiences low self-esteem and consequently, low self-confidence at some point in their life.

We all know the feeling of inadequacy and incompetence. It can happen when you face a new job, new relationship, or an unknown situation. There is some comfort in knowing that you are not alone, but you don’t want to get stuck in low self-confidence because it can impact every aspect of your life. It can be at the root of disappointing friendships and love relationships, lower long-term earning potential and missed opportunities for high quality jobs and promotions. There is also strong correlation between low self-confidence and substance abuse, eating disorders, anxiety, depression, and other destructive conditions and behaviors.

How Low Self-Confidence Affects Relationships

Wednesday, October 17, 2018

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Confidence: Working Together for Your Good

Self-esteem To feel successful and be satisfied in life, a person needs a healthy sense of self-esteem and self-confidence. Let’s look at what these qualities are and how they work together.

“Esteem” in Latin means to appraise, value, rate, weigh, or estimate. Simply stated, your self-esteem reflects what you believe about yourself – positive, negative, or neutral. Your beliefs in turn influence the quality of your emotions. And, in many cases, it is the quality of both your beliefs and emotions that strongly influences and shapes your behavior.

Thursday, September 28, 2017

10 Things That Turn Women Off

WomenIn most healthy marriages, both the husband and wife enjoy physical intimacy. There was a time when women were taught to “endure” their husbands’ advances, but thankfully we have grown past that archaic mindset and into the realization that God designed sex in marriage to be pleasing to both spouses.

And yet, a lot of men still complain about their wives’ lack of interest in physical affection and sexual intimacy. What’s the problem? I have found that many men simply do not understand how they might influence this indifference or lack of desire.

As a psychologist, I have spoken a great deal with men and women on the subject of marital intimacy, so I hear both sides of the story. It is rare that someone’s marriage is affected by all ten of these turn-offs, but they are common enough that you might recognize yours in one or two of them.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Are You the Genuine Article?

Self-ConfidentHave you ever been tricked into buying something you thought was authentic only to find out later that you received a counterfeit? With the explosion of online shopping comes greater opportunity for unscrupulous sellers to fool buyers into investing in products that aren’t worth the price.

On the surface, it is sometimes difficult to tell the difference between a fake and the real thing. However, upon closer examination it becomes evident that the counterfeit lacks authenticity, quality and reliability. What a disappointment to realize that an expensive item like a Rolex watch, a Louis Vuitton handbag or a pair of high-tech Nike sneakers isn’t the real thing!

This is not only true for jewelry or clothing, but for people as well. It is not uncommon to find people wearing masks that portray a false image they think others want to see.

Friday, July 7, 2017

Confidence in Mind

Self-ConfidenceKristen Linaman-Weleba, MS

Has low self-confidence caused you emotional pain or robbed you of positive opportunities and desirable experiences? If so, Kristen and I invite you to follow us on Instagram – confidence_in_mind – to get the latest updates on our soon to be released online course, Confidence in Mind, along with helpful tips for building and maintaining unshakable self-confidence.

Live, Work, and Relate Well!

Dr. Todd

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Understanding and Responding to Bullies

BullySticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. Wrong! Hurtful words can leave emotional wounds long after the damage caused by a stick or stone has been healed. Cruel, harsh and threatening words often strike at the very core of a child’s sense of worth and value causing them to experience a sense of self-doubt, inadequacy and inferiority that can haunt them for a lifetime. This is often the consequence of bullying. In fact, it seems that the news reports more and more incidences in which children and teens have chosen to commit suicide rather than continue being subjected to the intense pain caused by a bully.

Although bullying has been around since biblical times, it is a growing concern among many parents. Despite the increased efforts of many caring and concerned school administrators and teachers, bullying, on and off school campuses, is on the rise.

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

I Just Don’t Like Confrontation

ConfrontationWhile helping clients navigate the pain and frustration associated with some of their most important relationships I often hear a very familiar phrase, “I just don’t like confrontation.” The truth is, the vast majority of people fear confrontation.  The thought of confrontation often evokes fear of criticism, rejection, and/or conflict. There are multiple reasons associated with wanting to avoid confrontation, but I want to address just one of them today – fear of rejection.

Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Do You Worry About What People Think?

It’s been said that more people are held captive in the prison of their own minds than in all the jail cells in the world… and Worry is their warden. There are countless things that may weigh heavily on our minds, but I have worked with many people who significantly struggle with worrying about what people think about them, and they always pay a price.

worryMany of the decisions you make on a daily basis, like what to wear, the music to listen to, what to say in a conversation, or who to associate with are governed, in large part, by a goal-directed conscious or unconscious process that attempts to influence what people think about you. We call this process impression management.